Last week I said goodbye to a few of my paintings, including my favorite which I had until recently kept stored in my personal collection, Projection in Bear Arms. It was a painting I had worked on through three studio transitions until I finally finished it in my fourth and current studio, here at Borough, in 2007. It was the first painting I finished in Vermont, actually, and one of its details provides the image for this website's homepage. "Projection..." has always been magical to me, and it's also huge. By the time I finished framing it it met my eyebrows. It was going to a great new home, though, so off we and a huge rental van trucked, down to nyc through lots of rain, lots of lightning; many friends, many, many late night laughs.
The first photo looks kind of funny reflected in the new yoga mirrors (the new entrance to Borough is a yoga/tai chi studio...entering and exiting is so awkward now; without fail, I almost always time my arrival right in the middle of a class), but you get the idea.
In the spirit of farewell, here's the writing that went along with this, my most sentimental painting, which was all about whimsical l-l-l-love and goodbyes. Every time I looked at this painting, I still felt the words, "...and moments that make you want to crawl inside another as every one of their breaths is a promise of feeling so vivid forever". Read it after the jump (Read More).
In the spirit of farewell, here's the writing that went along with this, my most sentimental painting, which was all about whimsical l-l-l-love and goodbyes. Every time I looked at this painting, I still felt the words, "...and moments that make you want to crawl inside another as every one of their breaths is a promise of feeling so vivid forever". Read it after the jump (Read More).
"Projection in Bear Arms"
Tell me that one does not crave another
Without sharing our existence, our existence is not worth maintaining
Show me someone who says otherwise, and I will show you a fool
We’re here merely to explore our love for one another in a myriad of tangible ways.
I am here to tell you of the cool breeze over the translucent blue layer
That covers the frozen earth’s surface as it glows under this pale moon’s beam
And to tell you of my lover’s touch as we build our story
And the way that same beam throws light off our skin and shadows across his forehead
As he looks down on me
Of watching the sun rise on his face, causing gold sparks in his cerulean eyes
Casting unflattering light onto his too-early wrinkles
Which created a novel for me of his past
I’m here to tell you of the feeling when riding along rails
Of leaving everything you know behind, and that feeling so swirled and mismatched
Of freedom of unknown future, and despair of leaving any bit of your love behind
How every glimpse of land you pass makes you feel as though
It’s the first and last you’ll ever meet
How placing your hand upon the cool glass window makes your heart ache
For those whose heart you wish to be touching
I’m here to tell you of those quiet moments not shared with others’ ears
That express volumes of hidden realities when covers cover eyes, when pillows block out
sound
So inner televisions of the subconscious’ desires play repeatedly through the mind and
behind lids
No one could tell you what they really see, what their inner life sounds like,
The sensations they explore.
But we all know what the rushed solitude sounds like
I’m here to remind you of those moments when our hearts beat counterclockwise to our
desire’s march, that stirring revelation that beats like wings against the inside of our skull
Dear darling, this goes out to you.
I cannot tell you of buffalo or ocean life
I cannot tell you of wretched strife to maintain a lifestyle
I cannot tell you of glorious promises come true or happy endings for all
But I can tell you only what I know:
Of fiery sunsets under a sky of tomorrow’s promises,
Of the feeling of cool grass against bare knees
I can tell you of words to make you melt and moments that make you want to crawl
inside another as every one of their breaths is a promise of feeling so vivid forever
I can tell you of longing, of turmoil, of guilt and remorse
I can tell you of splendor, of brilliance, of the look of so many tomorrows within
another’s eyes;
Changed minds, disenchantment, of realizing you no longer want another’s presence
entangled in your own…of realizing they no longer want you entangled with theirs.
I can tell you that this universe we live in, this universe that hovers above us, lingers next
to us, gives us ground to walk upon
It does not always let us live out what we desire most
But it always gives us something now. It is always giving us something now.
____________________________________________________________________________
The cobblestones each come alive, I clasped your hand and we ran
We ran to where the people were, we ran to the lights
We ran until we heard voices that were not our own
And then stared at each other, flush faced and glowing
And we laughed, and then danced as though no one else was there.
In our circle, our own hands, make
Clap Clap Clap
We felt restless and alive with meaning and that meaning was now
You held the light of so many before you
You carried the age of so many others’ thoughts.
We were old in our young age, our feet sat right, everything was aglow.
I bid you farewell, while still holding you tight.
I’ve loved you always
I’ve loved you always.
I’ve loved you always.
While throwing rocks into the water my toes beat
To the night we could not run hard enough
To the night we could not laugh hard enough
To the night we were everything we needed to be
To the night I bid you farewell.
The breeze blows us away and through the sheets hanging on the line outside our house
We stumble inwards, we, empty handed, hand ourselves to each other
We waltz our emptiness together
Hands above our head, clapping,
Hands towards each other, giving
Hands around each other, creating
His harmony, it sings sweetly to me
Wraps itself around my head until drunk on its sweet, sweet sweetness
Sweetness and light.
He has become the air in which all things fly.
At once I believed in a vision not small
A murder of crows may flow between us but they only make us grin
Heart swelled and anticipation high
An escape from the jarring pain that destroys bright dreams
Sheer hope, it swallows me whole, this vision.
Without sharing our existence, our existence is not worth maintaining
Show me someone who says otherwise, and I will show you a fool
We’re here merely to explore our love for one another in a myriad of tangible ways.
I am here to tell you of the cool breeze over the translucent blue layer
That covers the frozen earth’s surface as it glows under this pale moon’s beam
And to tell you of my lover’s touch as we build our story
And the way that same beam throws light off our skin and shadows across his forehead
As he looks down on me
Of watching the sun rise on his face, causing gold sparks in his cerulean eyes
Casting unflattering light onto his too-early wrinkles
Which created a novel for me of his past
I’m here to tell you of the feeling when riding along rails
Of leaving everything you know behind, and that feeling so swirled and mismatched
Of freedom of unknown future, and despair of leaving any bit of your love behind
How every glimpse of land you pass makes you feel as though
It’s the first and last you’ll ever meet
How placing your hand upon the cool glass window makes your heart ache
For those whose heart you wish to be touching
I’m here to tell you of those quiet moments not shared with others’ ears
That express volumes of hidden realities when covers cover eyes, when pillows block out
sound
So inner televisions of the subconscious’ desires play repeatedly through the mind and
behind lids
No one could tell you what they really see, what their inner life sounds like,
The sensations they explore.
But we all know what the rushed solitude sounds like
I’m here to remind you of those moments when our hearts beat counterclockwise to our
desire’s march, that stirring revelation that beats like wings against the inside of our skull
Dear darling, this goes out to you.
I cannot tell you of buffalo or ocean life
I cannot tell you of wretched strife to maintain a lifestyle
I cannot tell you of glorious promises come true or happy endings for all
But I can tell you only what I know:
Of fiery sunsets under a sky of tomorrow’s promises,
Of the feeling of cool grass against bare knees
I can tell you of words to make you melt and moments that make you want to crawl
inside another as every one of their breaths is a promise of feeling so vivid forever
I can tell you of longing, of turmoil, of guilt and remorse
I can tell you of splendor, of brilliance, of the look of so many tomorrows within
another’s eyes;
Changed minds, disenchantment, of realizing you no longer want another’s presence
entangled in your own…of realizing they no longer want you entangled with theirs.
I can tell you that this universe we live in, this universe that hovers above us, lingers next
to us, gives us ground to walk upon
It does not always let us live out what we desire most
But it always gives us something now. It is always giving us something now.
____________________________________________________________________________
The cobblestones each come alive, I clasped your hand and we ran
We ran to where the people were, we ran to the lights
We ran until we heard voices that were not our own
And then stared at each other, flush faced and glowing
And we laughed, and then danced as though no one else was there.
In our circle, our own hands, make
Clap Clap Clap
We felt restless and alive with meaning and that meaning was now
You held the light of so many before you
You carried the age of so many others’ thoughts.
We were old in our young age, our feet sat right, everything was aglow.
I bid you farewell, while still holding you tight.
I’ve loved you always
I’ve loved you always.
I’ve loved you always.
While throwing rocks into the water my toes beat
To the night we could not run hard enough
To the night we could not laugh hard enough
To the night we were everything we needed to be
To the night I bid you farewell.
The breeze blows us away and through the sheets hanging on the line outside our house
We stumble inwards, we, empty handed, hand ourselves to each other
We waltz our emptiness together
Hands above our head, clapping,
Hands towards each other, giving
Hands around each other, creating
His harmony, it sings sweetly to me
Wraps itself around my head until drunk on its sweet, sweet sweetness
Sweetness and light.
He has become the air in which all things fly.
At once I believed in a vision not small
A murder of crows may flow between us but they only make us grin
Heart swelled and anticipation high
An escape from the jarring pain that destroys bright dreams
Sheer hope, it swallows me whole, this vision.
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