CROSSING barriers, transcending limitations, rising to the occasion, placing your fears and insecurities out in the open, staying present and maintaining awareness all while following your heart; it's what makes a person feel alive. As this new year hits, I've made the promise to myself that I won't forget what's best for me, no matter the opposition, and keep a firm hold on the reality of what's important to me while staying open to the possibility of the unknown.
Clear statements of intent, desire, pain and honesty are not only sexy, they're so liberating in spite of the initial fear. It's scary as hell to open yourself to vulnerability or criticism, the possibility of disappointment or pain. But, knowing you brought yourself to that level - opened the field to reality and not just hope, projections or independent ideas - is so satisfying, so self affirming. We can't always get what we want, no, but we can know that we're trying. Aren't we all just a work in progress anyway? As a young person, I know that my desires change, my goals change, my priorities change and every now and then I have a change of heart. It's healthy. It's curiosity. It's passion. You don't have to agree.
This all stems from an article I recently read, an interview with John Currin where he stated that the most important development he ever made was realizing that you just need to follow your pleasure, at least as a painter. That's what any kind of artist needs to do, no matter what they're doing, and a quote from William Faulkner: “The writer’s only responsibility is to his art. He will be completely ruthless if he is a good one. He has a dream. It anguishes him so much he must get rid of it. He has no peace until then. Everything goes by the board: honor, pride, decency, security, happiness, all, to get the book written.”
Mull it over. Can't both of these statements bridge the gap between the studio and outside life? Uh, yeah. They're both saying live your life by your own guidelines, by what's best for you. We all know what's important to us as individuals, we all know what we can do in good conscience and what we'll hate ourselves for. We know where our moral compass points, what makes us feel happy and what burns our heart to a level that we must find some sort of extinguisher or risk an outbreak of fever. Everyone craves and desires a different ideal - for some it's security, for some it's stability, freedom, kindness or aggression, importance or commitment. Sometimes it's all of the above. Personally, I place understanding above all. Understanding requires depth of thought, and caring enough to be curious in the first place, wanting to be on the same page so you can go forward in honesty. That's just me.
This past summer I had a revelation that blew my mind, had me tied up for a week, that may be so simple and obvious to some, but was the development I'd been waiting to have all of my mature adult life: I learned and finally understood how to love, and not just fumble around with it. It's not something you can hold, no, it's not something you can hand over or grasp. Real love isn't even about just giving. Love, in reality, is about the ability to receive, being open. Much in the way that oxytocin takes over and inhibits fears, anxiety and insecurities so one can become fully engaged in pleasure and let go to achieve orgasm, love is about (apologies for the cheesy analogy) being an open glass that merely receives and pours at the same time, does not aspire to grab or merely focus on extending. I feel like the world opens up when as a person we can maintain an open mind and an open heart. If we always follow our heart, speak from our heart, we can trust our own actions and desires, and it allows others to trust us as well.
So, with this in mind, I bid you all a happy artistic experience, with artistic intent that drives you mad, brings you to and above your limits, keeps you peaceful and secure, and allows you to love and trust your own abilities. We can all change our minds and change our course at any time, so don't lose faith in yourself or your ambitions. Be open to your art, be open to your life, and just enjoy what you have for what it is, knowing that anything in the entire world is possible so it's less important to focus on a single outcome and more important to take pleasure in the process, the experience, the progress-the living part of life. It's mysterious state of being that's shockingly straight forward and sincere. Transcend your limitations, and become familiar with your own boundaries - follow your own pleasure.
Clear statements of intent, desire, pain and honesty are not only sexy, they're so liberating in spite of the initial fear. It's scary as hell to open yourself to vulnerability or criticism, the possibility of disappointment or pain. But, knowing you brought yourself to that level - opened the field to reality and not just hope, projections or independent ideas - is so satisfying, so self affirming. We can't always get what we want, no, but we can know that we're trying. Aren't we all just a work in progress anyway? As a young person, I know that my desires change, my goals change, my priorities change and every now and then I have a change of heart. It's healthy. It's curiosity. It's passion. You don't have to agree.
This all stems from an article I recently read, an interview with John Currin where he stated that the most important development he ever made was realizing that you just need to follow your pleasure, at least as a painter. That's what any kind of artist needs to do, no matter what they're doing, and a quote from William Faulkner: “The writer’s only responsibility is to his art. He will be completely ruthless if he is a good one. He has a dream. It anguishes him so much he must get rid of it. He has no peace until then. Everything goes by the board: honor, pride, decency, security, happiness, all, to get the book written.”
Mull it over. Can't both of these statements bridge the gap between the studio and outside life? Uh, yeah. They're both saying live your life by your own guidelines, by what's best for you. We all know what's important to us as individuals, we all know what we can do in good conscience and what we'll hate ourselves for. We know where our moral compass points, what makes us feel happy and what burns our heart to a level that we must find some sort of extinguisher or risk an outbreak of fever. Everyone craves and desires a different ideal - for some it's security, for some it's stability, freedom, kindness or aggression, importance or commitment. Sometimes it's all of the above. Personally, I place understanding above all. Understanding requires depth of thought, and caring enough to be curious in the first place, wanting to be on the same page so you can go forward in honesty. That's just me.
This past summer I had a revelation that blew my mind, had me tied up for a week, that may be so simple and obvious to some, but was the development I'd been waiting to have all of my mature adult life: I learned and finally understood how to love, and not just fumble around with it. It's not something you can hold, no, it's not something you can hand over or grasp. Real love isn't even about just giving. Love, in reality, is about the ability to receive, being open. Much in the way that oxytocin takes over and inhibits fears, anxiety and insecurities so one can become fully engaged in pleasure and let go to achieve orgasm, love is about (apologies for the cheesy analogy) being an open glass that merely receives and pours at the same time, does not aspire to grab or merely focus on extending. I feel like the world opens up when as a person we can maintain an open mind and an open heart. If we always follow our heart, speak from our heart, we can trust our own actions and desires, and it allows others to trust us as well.
So, with this in mind, I bid you all a happy artistic experience, with artistic intent that drives you mad, brings you to and above your limits, keeps you peaceful and secure, and allows you to love and trust your own abilities. We can all change our minds and change our course at any time, so don't lose faith in yourself or your ambitions. Be open to your art, be open to your life, and just enjoy what you have for what it is, knowing that anything in the entire world is possible so it's less important to focus on a single outcome and more important to take pleasure in the process, the experience, the progress-the living part of life. It's mysterious state of being that's shockingly straight forward and sincere. Transcend your limitations, and become familiar with your own boundaries - follow your own pleasure.
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